Las Aparicio Recaps ep 116-118

What's up, guys?

Almost done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let's get to it.

Episode 116

Aparicio Central. Night.

Everyone is trying to comfort Mariana now that her dad is dead. Camilo tells her that he died in peace. Rafaela reminds her that he lived a full life and lived life his way. He was a warrior, like Mariana.

There's all sorts of crying and emoness going on.


Julia tells Mariana that they can postpone the wedding if she needs some time. Mariana assures her that she's fine and asks Camilo how Hernan died.

Saving a busload of orphans from impending death, probably. Wait, he was sick, so I guess not.

Actually, it is kind of like that. After taping the video, Hernan went to see the girl whose baby he had delivered to make sure that she was okay. She had an infection but he did everything he could to make her better. He fell asleep in a chair next to her and never woke up, a big smile on his lips.

Mmm. I thought that cancer was more complicated/painful than that, and I say that with respect.

Camilo assures Mariana that he died thinking about her.

Mariana seems very comforted by the story and says that there's much to do and life goes on.


Later that night, Mariana is on the phone speaking in English, which I guess means that she's giving her mom the news.


When she hangs up, Mariana says that her mom was really shocked, so much so that she (the mom) told her (Mariana) that she loved her. Julia asks her if the mother is coming to the wedding, but Emo didn't even tell her about that.

The stick hasn't found its way back into Ileana's ass, since she's still supportive and tells Mariana that she's sorry about Hernan and insists that she needs to let her feelings out, otherwise it will be worst.

Ileana should know since she had her own nervous breakdown because of the stuff with her dad. Julia agrees with Ileana and reiterates that they're there to give her support.

Emo insists that she's fine, she has to be strong. Hernan wouldn't want her to be sad, anyway. She just needs a cuddle, so Julia gives it to her.


Armando's Cave. Day.

Darmando Update: After the threesome with the other dude, he was okay with it, although he needed a little time to 'process' it.

He's a lesbian now.

He kept asking Dani to go with with him, but she wouldn't, so he ended up going to London by himself. Wait, it wasn't London. It was...um... I don't remember, whatever. Somewhere in England. Either way, he couldn't even go to the wedding because he couldn't change his flight.

Bye, Armando, I did like you in the end. Shocking, huh?

Aparicio Central. Day.

It's the wedding day already. Things get done fast at La Casa Aparicio. Either that, or it's a shotgun wedding because Julia got Mariana pregnant that time they had sad sex.

It could happen.

The wedding is at the house and Ileana, Mercedes and Alma are helping to set everything up.


Ileana is particularly happy about it because she loves Julia and Mariana and now realizes that she wants to be a lawyer and, why I am recapping this when the girls are nowhere in sight?

I got distracted.

Inside the house, the girls are getting dressed.


I don't like their clothes. Julia's wearing some shawl and looks like a grandma and Mariana just doesn't really look like Mariana.

Rafaela is helping them and giving them her words of wisdom. She's happy that they're still going through with it, after all, life goes on.

Rafaela: How much time did it take you to realize that you loved each other? A long, long time. Now, look at you now. What you're doing is an act of love, an act of bravery....

Rafaela shuts up before she's starts crying. I'm glad she does, because they were going down that goddamn 'revolutionary' road again....

Camilo arrives wanting to see Marina. He comes bearing Hernan's ashes.


On her wedding day? Seriously, guey? What's wrong with you?

In his mind it makes sense because Hernan wanted to be with her on her wedding day, and now he can be.

Uncool, hippie priest, uncool. Way to throw some salt in the wound.

He also gives her a pair of boots that Hernan had planned to give her on her wedding day.


Emo is understandably sad and asks for some time alone.


The sad violins play and play and play and for some reason I feel like I'm watching Masterpiece Theater.

During her time alone, Mariana thinks for a bit before putting on the Hernan boots and leaving.


This makes me super excited (for real) because:

a. It makes me giddy to imagine Mariana leaving Julia at the altar. We know she won't, but it's still satisfying to fantasize about it.
b. I'm curious to see where she's going. And I haven't been curious about this show in a loooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggggggggg time.

In about two seconds, since you get no privacy when you're in a relationship with Julia, the Queen starts looking everywhere for Mariana, who's walking aimlessly around Mexico DF.


Those boots were made for walking, gueys.

As she walks, she thinks of Hernan and his last words and continues to look all sad, which is NOT how you should feel on your wedding day. Even if you're marrying Julia Gonzalez Aparicio.

Yes, that is her full name and I'm horrified because Gonzalez is my last name too. I hope we're not related, Jesus. Could I have some of the crazy within me too?

Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

Mariana takes a taxi and we still don't know where she's going.

Mexican Plaza. Day.

The taxi takes her to that iconic Mexican plaza whose name I don't know, but probably should. The paper in her hand says 'gay marriage: an aberration and an attack against society'.



Auggggghhhh. Again with the fucking homophobia, goddamn it. You keep up this preaching and you're going to annoy me so much that you'll TURN me into a homophobe.

Aparicio Central. Day.

Julia is still freaking out because Mariana's gone and her cell is off.


I enjoy her distress. You've turned me into a sadist, Julia, you've spoiled my soul.

Her distress doesn't last long because Mariana calls her and tells her where she is and asks her to meet her there.

When Julia gets there, they have this hollywood 'running toward each other and hugging' moment, because, you know, they haven't seen each other for a whole hour.


Important Looking Building. Day.

All the walking and thinking and homophobic remarks in the newspaper made Mariana realize that she wants to marry Julia in public, at a massive ceremony where a big group of gay couples are going to get married.

Mariana: Julia Aparicio, our love is not an aberration, or an attempt agaisnt society...that's why I want to get married here, with you, at the heart of our city, in front of all of these people. So that the world can know that I love you and that I want you as my wife and that there is nothing about it that makes me feel ashamed.


Julia cries tears of joy and they kiss.


The Aparicio women, plus Nana, Dani and Miguel, arrive all excited. They even bring with them the necessary paperwork, so the wedding is a go.


We get a sappy speech about gay marriage from someone who I figure is a government official or something.

Then, a whole lot of queers get married, including Juliana.


Isn't it convenient that this was happening, precisely on their planned wedding day? Even more suspension of disbelief, my friends.

Tonight I leave you with...........


...........Alejandro's ass! Because we got so much of it in this episode!

Enjoy!

Episode 117

Wedding place. Day.

After the group wedding, each couple gets to go up to the stage and sign papers and get married individually.

Mariana and Julia sign the papers, as do Dani and Rafaela, their witnesses.


Julia González Aparicio and Mariana Almada Torres are now Julia Aparicio Almada and Mariana Almada Aparicio.

That's cute an all, but makes no sense. What did they do with the González?!!! Uncool.

Anyway, there's all sorts of cheering going on.


When they get off the stage, the sisters congratulate the new married women. The girls even exchange rings and 'I love you's.


And then we get this mega lame line.

Rafaela: See, Julia? Not fairy, not ballerina, nor princess. Julia Aparicio Almada. A complete woman.

Oy. Could it be any sappier?

Also, does Rafaela really believe that? Oy again. Julia still hasn't taken a bullet for Mariana yet, so I still don't trust her 100%, although I am enjoying these last couple of episodes.

Aparicio Central. Day.

The girls arrive at the house and the cheering and happiness continues. The guests even throw rice at them and all.


And there's Miguel again. Wait, where's Betito? I thought they were literally joined at the hip!

Anyhoo, now that the civil part is over, it's time for the religious ceremony with Camilo.


He starts talking about how he met Hernan a million years ago in some jungle in the middle of a war zone or something and bla, bla, bla. Plus, he wants to bless their union and he's sure that God would bless it too.

But let's let to the good stuff: the vows.


Mariana: Julia, I want to promise you love, laughter. I want to promise you freedom. I want to promise you that I will never stop being the best friend who will run to your side without a moment of doubt. I will never stop being your support, your shoulder to cry on, your refuge, the one who holds your hand. I want to promise you that I will be your accomplice, your lover, your wife. Julia, I promise you my life.

Julia: Mariana, to me, the word 'love' has always meant two contradictory things. The first means what I love the most. The second, what has hurt me the most. But ever since I found you and looked at you in the eye for the first time, all of that changed because now, to me, love is commitment, it's taking a risk, it's trusting, and it's not fearing anything. And ever since I've been with you, that's what has happened to me. You mean all the love for me, you are my love.

I'm not going to be snarky, because I don't want to spoil it for those of you who still ship those two.

Then there's more kissing and cheering and cakes with two brides on them (that don't look like Julia and Mariana at all, by the way) and Claudio catching the bouquet.


I kinda want some cake, now.

Bar. Night.

Dani update: Dani is going to be an escort!


She loves the idea, and now I want some therapy too!

Juliana's Loft. Night.

The married couple arrives home. For a moment, Julia just stands there smiling and I fear that she wants Mariana to carry her to the bed or something.


She's not that strong, guey.

It turns out that Julia doesn't want that, and Mariana just welcomes her home. Julia asks Mariana why she did all that she did today, and Mariana said that she just felt very lost and Hernan sent her a sign (what sign?) that reminded her that she's always walked in Julia's direction.

There's more kissing (their lips must be sore by now, damn), followed by married!sex.


Damn, these two fuck a lot. If they could reproduce, they'd sure give those '19 kids and counting' gueys a run for their money.

Tonight I leave you with...........


......that ring shot! Because it gave me serious Queer as Folk Michael/Ben-just-married flashbacks!


Enjoy!

Episode 118

Juliana's Loft. Night.

During the voice over, Nana talks about orgasms and Julia and Mariana are still having hot, married!sex.


Afterwards, the girls are in post sex glow and in disbelief that they're actually married. In fact, they're super married and bound forever.



They take it as a good thing, but if I ever found myself married to Julia González Aparicio Almada (I'm not leaving the González out, damn it), I think that I'd have a panic attack.

They talk some more about having to be called 'Mrs.' now, instead of 'Miss', which makes them get a bit serious and start talking about growing up, getting real jobs, credit cards, eating more vegetables and having SUVs to fill with children.

Joder, Mariana. You just made me NOT want to get married.

When Julia asks her if she really wants those things, Mariana says that she doesn't necessarily want all of them, but she's got the age and the wife so she might as well start growing up, even though she still feels like a kid.

Por Dios, Mariana, don't say those things. You're depressing me.

Julia says that she too feels like a kid a lot of times.

I have to disagree, Julia. You don't FEEL like a child, you ARE a child. We've established a million recaps ago that you're 14, have you forgotten?

The young one (Julia) says that she thinks that it's okay to be a child at heart. I agree with Julia on something. Armageddon must be near.

The next day, Mrs. Almada González Aparicio is on the phone giving her mother the news.


Mariana: Her..name..is..Julia Aparicio. Mom, you've known her a long time....yes...no...Ay, Mom! Don't cry, come on!

Apparently, Mrs. 'Horrible Mother of the year who never accepted that her daughter was gay and whose only communication with said daughter are monthly checks ' is crying because she's so happy and really would've LOVED to have been at the wedding.

Gueys, I think they really do want to have a second season. They're setting things up with Dani being an Alma whore now, and Mariana talking to her mom, Jana being back....

Madre de Dios. I don't think I can take another 120 episodes of this, gueys. And I just know that if they have a second season I'd get curious and find myself sucked into this vortex of Julia bullshit again, like it happened to Mariana.

Help me.

Anyway, Mariana is a little indifferent because she doesn't need her mom's approval anymore. In fact, as part of her new growing up motto, she decides that it's time to send her mother's checks back since she's always complained about her mother's inability to show love in a way that doesn't involve money, yet she always accepted the checks.

They talk about money some more and Julia says that they need a job because they need more money! Then they get all cozy and happily married again.

Aparico Central. Night.

The girls, I mean, married women, are helping Rafaela set the dinner table and talking about their future plans.


For the first time in a long time, I really like what Julia's wearing and think that she looks really hot.

Anyway. The girls are already making plans for the future. Plans that include bigger cars and opening a cool restaurant that can feature theater pieces at night.

Damn it, I keep telling you, they're setting us up for season two. I just imagined them managing a restaurant. Hell, even Miguel can be there too.

Sigh.

Rafaela loves the idea, and even offers to invest in it (she's rich, remember?). But Julia declines, they want to be grown ups and do it by themselves, which makes Rafaela even prouder. She even tells the Hernan urn that he must be very proud of his daughter, which makes Mariana freak out a little.

I'm with her.

That gets them talking about what to do with the ashes. It's up to Mariana since Utopio left no instructions.

Mariana decides to bury the ashes in Rafaela's yard, which I find very uncool since he wasn't their pet.

Creepy, gueys.

She also buries her old boots, which, of course, symbolizes the beginning of her new life.

Deep, huh? Sort of like when Xena buried her weapons in Sins of the past and A friend In Need part 2.

The Xena geeks will know what I mean.

While she does all the burying, we get a montage of Hernan moments, his goodbye voice over included. Can you believe that we get yet ANOTHER Hernan goodbye?

Ah, how much I will not miss him, but I know Marianita will.

After burying his ashes, Mariana plants a tree above it.


I find this even creepier, but I'll keep my mouth shut.


Tonight I leave you with...........


.......Claudio getting shot! Because, holy shit I didn't see it coming! Which rarely happens in this show anymore!

Enjoy!

Comments=love!