What's up, guys?
Things have been looking gloomy in the Aparicio fandom after The Powers That Be decided to be mean and block all video content that isn't on Telemundo.com.
I really don't think they're going to make people watch the show over there, they're just pissing us off. And if people have to wait four months for Telemundo to catch up to ep 80 something, well, no one will care about the show anymore by then.
I'm having a hard time getting my hands on the eps...I've managed so far, but if my sources dry up, well, so will the recaps.
Let's hope it doesn't get to that point.
And we have a new follower! Hi! Three is the magic number. I also want to thank you guys for the comments. They make my day, keep them coming.
Bisexual Polyville, part deux. Night.
Armando just got off the phone with his uncle. The girls, unlike me, are just dying to know what he found out.
It turns out that Armando Sr got himself out of his hole. He's working and sober and living somewhere that isn't Mexico DF. Armando says where, but, for the life of me, I can't spell it, or even repeat it. I'm not Mexican so I'm completely unfamiliar with stuff like this.
The girls try to cheer up their husband since it sounds like his dad is better than they expected he would be. Julia even suggests the three of them going on a road trip to meet him.
Augh. Please, don't go.
Armando isn't so sure it's a good idea. If his father has been okay and sober for a while, and hasn't tried to contact him, well maybe Armando Sr. is mad at Armando Jr., you know, for bailing on him in his hour of need and all.
I tend to agree with Armando Sr. if that's the case. You were an asshole, Assmando.
Mariana tries to justify such abandonment by telling Armando that he left his dad because he was harmful to him. Bla, bla, bla. Armando isn't convinced and still feels bad, after all, he had the time and the money to help his dad and didn't.
And I repeat: you were an asshole, guey, but I'm glad you admit it. Unlike Julia, who perhaps is 15 now instead of 14, you've grown up a lot.
Good for you.
Armando wonders how deep his dad had to fall before he pulled himself together. Julia tells him he probably hit rock bottom and then pulled himself together, as people like him (addicts?) do.
I'm not liking Mariana and Julia's attitude with this. Where's your compassion, gueys?
Armando decides that he has to find his dad and ask for his forgiveness.
Again, good for you.
Again, bad for me.
I can't take any more daddy issues in this show.
Julia tells him they will support him and will even go with him to see his dad. Mariana doesn't really agree.
She thinks it's something that Armando has to do by himself, or perhaps with Julia, but not with her.
What's this? I thought he was your husband too, Mari. Or your platonic boyfriend. Sometimes I even get the feeling you like him more than Julia, so WTF?
Armando, however, seems to have stolen back his balls, or at least one of them. He decides he has to go alone because it was his mistake and he has to fix it himself.
Wait, if he goes alone, does it mean we won't get to see the whole thing?
Oh, please, God, please. Let them not have any budget to pay another actor and go to a different location.
Please, please, let this play out off screen.
As he walks away, Julia gives him a well deserved hug.
The next day, Julia is packing Armando's luggage and yawning while Mariana looks on. Mari asks her if she didn't sleep well and points out that she looks like she ran a marathon.
I so want whatever chill pill this girl takes every day that makes her able to be so zen about her girlfriend having sex with some guy. And hey, I thought you only had group sex now, so, weren't you there?
Julia murmurs that it was his farewell screw. Sariana (sarcasm+Mariana) points out he's coming back in three days, not in six months.
Armando comes out of the shower and we have a repeat of the crazy-Mariana-toilet-seat incident. He's actually quite chill about it, unlike the crazy lesbian, but he doesn't like the fact that someone left their panties drying in the shower and they've been using his razor.
Well, that's living with a woman for ya. I mean, two women. Let's hope they shaved their legs with your razor and not somewhere else. They wouldn't, would they?
Although, they don't seem to have much problems swapping fluids between them three....
Julia apologizes and says his razor works really good and, besides, they just used it once to shave their legs (that answers THAT question). Armando seems to have a razor fetish of some kind, since he goes on and on about how his razor has four blades and it's meant to be used on his face only and with its special foam.
WOW. And I thought my life was boring.
The girls kinda make fun of him and promise to buy him a new razor. That's not enough for him, since he continues to go on and on about it, about how they have to make the deal that they won't use his razor and he promises he won't leave the toilet seat up.
I think all the estrogen around him is turning Armando into a woman, because that was some fine naggin', I thought men were supposed to be more chill and messy. Don't screw up my gender stereotypes, gueys.
And remember what I said once about these people being into exhibitionism? Here's further proof:
An entire wall in Armando's bedroom is see through. So, unless there's some sort of curtain somewhere, I'm thinking Armando and Julia gave some poor forest animal a disturbing show last night.
Later that day, Armando is finally leaving. The girls bid their husband farewell. Julia tells him to be careful in the road (I guess he's driving). Mariana warns him not to stop at any bars at the side of the road. She knew some guy whose nickname was 'the horse' because he caught some sort of sickness there, or something
These guys lose me sometimes.
And I can't believe I'm saying this, but Armando looks kinda cute here:
I like his hair better wet. Many things are better wet.
Julia continues to support him and tells him all with be great with his pa. Mariana teases him that his father will be very proud he coaches the very best soccer little league in Mexico.
Armando bids his women farewell.
But before leaving, he reminds them, once again, to obey the rules of the house, including not moving the silverware around and not touching some autographed soccer ball he has somewhere.
Mariana, give him one of your chill pills. He's being annoying.
The girls joke about wanting to play a round of soccer with the ball. Before he can start yapping again, Julia tells him not to worry, that no one wants to touch his ball.
That, my friends, is the topic of this week. That no one wants to touch Armando's balls..eh..ball, anymore.
Since this is the longest goodbye EVER, Armando then turns over to Mariana and tells her to behave. Okay, tell me you did not just ask her to not have sex with Julia while you're gone. That's not cool.
Mariana tells him not to worry. Tell me you did NOT just agree. That's not cool.
They shake their hands on it and he finally leaves.
He doesn't even have one foot out the door when Mariana pounces on Julia.
Oooh. Kinky, eh? I'm still waiting for the show to tackle SM, will it be with you guys?
And tonight I leave with you....
Meche and Claudio! Because I'm starting to suspect she's in heat!
Alma's Atelier. Day.
The girls plus Ileana and Bruno are getting ready for the big class. They have given it the lamest name in the history of all things lame: 'Mom, Dad: I'm a duck'
I am not kidding you, that is what they called it.
Julia wants Ileana to put her writing skills to good use and write the introduction for their video, since she's a straight person who had a hard time accepting a loved one's queerness.
Ileana accepts, but not without some protest.
Bruno and Mariana bond over the footage the girls shot. It's unimportant, like Bruno.
My favorite part, though, is that she asks him what exactly is it he does for a living. I wonder the same thing all the time too.
He tells her he's an artist and a pro-environment activist, plus a don Juan.
Huh, does any of that pay you anything, though?
Meanwhile, Julia is helping Ileana with the introduction. Miss Stick in the mud is having a hard time finding the words, Julia tells her to just be honest about what she felt when she found out that Julia was bisexual and with Mariana.
Ileana admits that she felt like she had lost her aunt, friend and confidant, and that it pained her to feel that Julia loved Mariana more than her, which hurt because she loved Julia a lot.
When will our straight family members figure out that us being gay has NOTHING to do with them?
Stop trying to steal our thunder when we come out.
Ileana gives her aunt a hard time when Julia asks her if she still loves her and she says no.
Does that mean you're okay with gayness now, Miss Stick in the Mud?
Later that day, the class starts. You know this is fiction because the place is full.
My experience has been that straight people don't care enough to go to a thing like this, and gay people would rather hang out at a gay bar. Unless, of course, this was the last class open and they needed the college credit.
Sad, but true.
Alma introduces her sister and her girlfriend as the teachers. Bet you won't have the balls to say you have a boyfriend too, would you Julia?
Mariana starts the class telling the story of how they came up with the name, specifically about that duck talk she had with Ileana a while back. I continue to consider it lame, so I won't repeat it.
The whole point is that we can pretend to be something we're not (straight, in this case), but that won't make us that thing.
Miss Mariana welcomes people and tells introduces them to the class. They pass out some pamphlets and start watching the videos.
The video consists of a bunch of people on the street talking about gayness. The opinions range from acceptance to non acceptance and I have to ask again...why do we care about what complete strangers think about us?
I wonder if those were real people the Aparicio team approached in the street.
Later that day, people are leaving and the girls feel orgasmic after having done so much good for the world.
Wait, that's it? That was lame, gueys.
Julia feels they've just started in the best play of their lives.
Really, the random people in the street are the ones who should be proud if that's all you did. Let's assume the girls did say something else that made them so proud.
Bruno and Ileana thank them for allowing them to be a part of it. Mariana teases her and Ileana admits that she does, in fact, love her diverse family, including Mariana.
When everyone leaves, Julia and Mariana are cleaning up. They're still high with pride. Julia says that doing socially conscious work feels like the best orgasm of her life.
I really don't know what to say about that.
She goes on and on about it, and I'm too bored to go into details.
The point is that they're proud and they kiss and play around until Ileana walks in and wants to talk about Alma, who seems weird instead of happy about moving in with Leo. Julia points out that it is probably difficult for Alma, who has always valued her independence, to make such a big commitment. Julia says she went through something similar too.
Ileana: Really? When? When you moved in with Armando? Or when you moved in with Mariana? Or when the three of you moved in together?
The three decide to throw Alma a party to cheer her up.
Aparicio Central. Night.
The three girls arrive all nice and smiling. Even Rafaela points out how tight Ileana and Mariana seem. Mariana responds by putting her arm around Ileana and almost liking her face.
Because, you, know, that's so appropriate. Ew, guey.
The girls tell Rafaela about the surprise party.
Later that night, the girls, and I mean all the girls in the family, surprise Alma. They have drinks and joke about having a stripper.
Alma asks them if they really did hire a stripper, to which Mariana answers that they ran out of money, but she herself (Mariana) can dance deliciously for her.
Come on over and give ME a lap dance, Mariana. I'll put bills in your undies.
As the night progresses, the girls talk about non important stuff and joke around, including Nana telling semi naughty stories about her late husband.
Isadora doesn't understand half of what they're saying and I wonder what the hell she's doing there to begin with.
Tonight I leave you with............
.......Leo's statue! Because even that's more interesting than Leo himself!
Aparicio Central. Night.
The party continues. As they're passing drinks around, Julia announces to the family that she WOULD like to get married some day. To Mariana.
Mariana looks at Julia with utter terror, and I would too at the thought of Julia ever becoming my wife.
Hey, what about Armando? You got tired of him already?
As the rest of the family presses Julia about it, she says that she really does mean it: she wants to marry Mariana, but in the future.
They turn the spotlight on Alma, who doesn't ever want to get married. Nana seems to have forgotten what marriage is like for most people, since she says it can be awesome and liberating.
Bisexual Polyville, part deux. Night.
Julia is on the phone with Armando and cooking. Apparently, everything went great with his dad.
And we didn't get to see it, yay!!!! No sarcasm here, I really I'm glad about this.
The moment Mariana walks into the kitchen, Julia can't wait to hang up on Armando. The evidence continues to pile up: she's outgrown him.
Even Mariana picks up on it when she tries to get Julia to talk about him and she won't elaborate.
Julia admits that, yes, she's not in the mood to talk about him, what she wants is some bellybutton!
Mariana, however, stops such playful seduction. She promised her pal that they'd behave and she's going to keep her word, it would be bad karma not to.
Sooo, he controls your sex life from the distance, too? You're so lame, gueys.
Julia feigns being hurt and says that she won't beg. Then they joke around about sending Mariana to sleep in the sofa, or the dog house.
You sure you're not married already? The sex is already scheduled and you're talking about doghouses.
Later that night, great things are happening.
The girls are having sex, without Armando being present or consenting. Aww, all is right with the world when lesbians do it without a man having anything to do with it.
When things start to get too heated, Mariana stops them.
Mariana: And Armando?
Julia: I don't care about Armando. The only person I love is you.
Orale, cool. Although experience has taught me to not trust Julia's word.
Right at that moment, Julia wakes up. It was all a dream.
Uh, oh. Any other person would just think it was simply a dream, but this is Julia, you just know it will put confusing ideas in her head, again.
And what's up with those bed sheets? It's summer, you should be sleeping naked and sheetless. I'm getting a heat stroke just looking at you. You even have the light on, Jesus.
Mariana wakes up at Julia's startled jump, and consoles her. Julia just tells her she had a nightmare, but won't say what it was about. Mariana whines that now she'll have a hard time falling asleep, so Julia gives her some sugar.
Bisexual Polyville, part deux. Day.
It's the next day and the girls continue to be all domestic. Julia is cleaning the kitchen and Mariana arrives with groceries, including the very, very important razors, so they can all shave in peace.
Mariana notices Julia is acting kinda weird, so she asks her what's up.
Miss Eternally Confused (I must use this name again) admits that her dream left her shaken up.
Dreams play a pretty big role in the lives of the Aparicio women, I suppose. Last night I dreamed I was in a triangle shaped polyamorous relationship with Ana and Teresa from AETR, and I don't go around trying to find greater meanings behind it. It was just fun. And hot. Mmm, I should watch a lot of Ana and Teresa clips tonight before bed again.
When Mariana asks her what the dream was about, Julia tells her everything.
Julia: I dreamed that you and I were making love, and it was super sweet.
Mariana (kissing Julia's neck): Sweet...that wasn't a dream.
Julia: Without Armando.
Mariana: What a great dream.
Julia: And you felt really bad about it, so you asked me where he was and I told you I didn't care about him, that the only person I love is you. What do you think it means?
Um, that you're a crazy and fickle nut?
Run, Mariana! Run! Even if she means it and right now she just loves you, what's to say she won't change her mind later? It's her MO.
I blame the head bad thing. There it is again. I think it puts too much pressure on the part of the brain that filters out what we say. It might explain why Julia has to talk about everything she ever thinks and feels at all times, therefore, driving those around her (including me) crazy.
You need to learn the importance of shutting the fuck up until you have useful stuff to say, guey.
Maybe Julia just enjoys being the center of the universe.
Mariana feels dread at the possibility that Miss Eternally Confused is, well, confused again.
I'm kinda glad she is, we need conflict. Although the redundancy of it is beyond redundant. They still come up with the same conflict time and time again. Gayness and Confusion. Snore.
Anyway, Emo and MEC continue to process. Julia wonders out loud if maybe she was confused before, but now what she said in the dream is the real answer.
Julia looks like a little kid while Mariana scolds her. She tells MEC that she can't believe that after she sold them the whole polyamory thing it turns out that that too was part of her confusions. Emo isn't mad, she just seems drained by Julia's BS.
Emo points out the obvious, Julia is telling her now that she loves her most, what's to say tomorrow she won't say the same thing to Armando?
MEC assures Emo that she loves her, there's never been any doubt of that in her heart. Mariana isn't a 100% convinced since in the dictionary, under 'confusion', there's a huge photo of Julia.
Mariana goes on further and points out that Julia lets herself be affected by stupid little things, like a dream. She respects MEC's feelings, she says, and begs Julia to respect her(Emo's) feelings as well as Armando's since they've made a lot of sacrifices for her.
Have they ever. They deserve to be canonized because of all the shit they've put up for Julia's sake.
Julia points out that they should get going to the Atelier.
I must admit that I find some sadistic pleasure at the fact that the dream that will be Armando's downfall happened on his bed.
He might be nice now, but the amount of disrespect Mariana suffered in her place back in the day was just appalling.
Alma's Atelier. Day.
Apparently their class has turned into a support group of some sort.
Just because they're queer they can give classes and shit? I'm a woman and that doesn't mean I can go and teach classes on gender studies or something at a community college.
Anyway, today they want to talk about the consequences of family rejection in gay people.
The PSA again.
They talk about Barbie and Ken and how hard love is and bla, bla, bla for all eternity.
They do say something I agree on, though. They mention how hard it is to be young and gay and trying to figure everything out, and looking for support and love in the wrong places like bars with the drinking and the drugs and the promiscuity, which fucks the young people up... all because they lack the support of their family.
I know of too many young people whose lives have been fucked up because of this.
So, kudos for pointing that out.
As they talk, we see some older guy in the audience who gets too many close ups, so we know he has some sappy story to tell, and will tell it soon.
I guess the whole thing wasn't a support group after all because no one else talks.
When the thing is over, the older guy approaches Julia and Mariana. He tells them about him and his son. Enrique, his son, told him ten years ago that he wanted to be a woman. The father slapped him and called him a fucking faggot. The older guy had felt betrayed and like they were stealing his son away.
Again with the making it all about you. Parents always do that... it's NOT about you, so stop it.
The father is now trying to accept his son, but doesn't know how.
Okay, that's valid. Good for you.
Aparicio Central. Night.
The family has gotten together to celebrate Alma's last night in the house. The girls are there looking all hot in black.
Nothing important happens here, they're just there making small talk.
And tonight I leave you with.....
....distrustful Alma! Because she looks hot and I can't wait for her to dump Leo!