Friday, October 1, 2010

Las Aparicio Recaps ep 105-106

What's up, guys?

Let's get to it.

Episode 105

Mariana's Loft. Day.

Julia and Mariana are hanging around and acting all coupley. Apparently, Mariana finally accepted Julia's proposition and they're officially together again.

....for you, Mariana. Julia may be acting sane lately, but I still have my doubts.

They continue with their coupley exchange. Julia jokes that she wants to call her 'Mariana Aparicio' now, but Mari doesn't want to. Even if they were to get married in a very, very, very, very distant future, she says, why wouldn't Julia take her last name, Almada?

Um, duh, Mariana. Because she's the boss, although it's cute that you like to pretend that you have some power.

They keep being cute and kissing and calling each other weird pet names.

Julia: I love you, precious.
Mariana: I love you too.

Aww. That was really cute and Julia seems really in love, but I'm still afraid that if I open my heart to Julia again 'mi caudal de penas no tendrĂ¡ fin'.

The kissing is interrupted by Julia's phone vibrating. It's Armando, and neither Julia or Mariana are happy about it. I think they even contemplate ignoring him.

See? They never loved you, guey.

He wants to invite them both to have dinner with him and Dani at his place. Julia's accepts and Mariana's afraid.

Julia: He invited us to go to dinner at his house.

Mariana groans.

Julia: And we're gonna go, you know why?
Mariana: Because you're craving another orgy?

Based on her behavior lately, Julia's becoming a sex addict, so you might as well start getting used to the orgies. Meche's secretary can help you out with the topic since she likes them too.

Julia denies the orgy theory. Do we believe her?

Julia: No! We're going because I think that if you and I have plans and we're moving forward, well, it's important to close circles and leave everything super clear. Don't you think?

Mariana still seems a bit concerned, but Julia starts the kissing again and they resume their cute coupley activities.

Armando's Cave. Night.

The four have returned to the scene of the orgy.

I wonder if they're all talking nicely and being all pleasant, but deep down they're really remembering each other naked.

Dani begins the conversation by asking the girls about the veto thing. I find it lame, so I won't discuss it.

Next, the conversation turns to their polyamourous phase. I find it lame as well, but it's somewhat important so I'll have to discuss it. Briefly.

Julia starts by saying that she felt that there were a lot of things they all needed to discuss together if they were to be able to leave them behind and move forward. Then she apologizes to everyone.

Julia: (to Dani) I feel that, to you, specifically, I've done things that I'm not proud of, and I want to apologize, and not just because of this last period that we've spent time together, since before, when you and Mariana were together. (to everyone) And seriously, I feel like I owe you three, each of you three separately, an apology because of this phase that I went through, that I hope it's gone, of selfishness and immaturity and of not knowing what I wanted for my life. It complicated everything and I just ended up hurting you all, and I swear that that was the last thing that I wanted to happen.

Well, that's all very nice, but where's your apology to ME? I suffered more than the three shmucks, at least they got some sex out of the deal. What did I get?

The shmucks believe her way easily than I would because she's Julia and when she pouts they get dumb and can't resist her. So they forgive her and even explain to us why they did the poly thing.

It wasn't that Julia did black magic on them, like I always say. No, no.

Mariana says that both she and Armando were just really afraid of losing Julia, so they let her do whatever she wanted with them, although they knew that whatever she did didn't come from a bad place. She goes on to say that what happened was their responsibility too, not just Julia's, and that they should just cut themselves some slack because in the end the three of them were just looking for a pretty love, like the ones from the movies.

Julia says that, in the end, the polyamory wasn't so bad because they shared some nice stuff together. Armando agrees: he wouldn't change a thing.

M'E'EC goes on to tell Armando that now she's found her true love and that she probably knew deep down all along, but she was too afraid to face it.

The evidence that they're all dolls-who-just-came-back-from-LA-imprinted-with-new-personalities-since-no-real-people-would-have-this-conversation-after-everything-that-happened keeps mounting up: Armando accepts that Julia found her real love and thanks her for telling him.

Dani makes a toast: to being humans who make mistakes and sometimes hurt the ones they love and bla, bla, bla.

The four dolls, Chaos (Julia), Slutty (Armando), Yoga (Dani) and Saint (Mariana), drink to it.

What a fake scene, gueys, blah. Just promise me you will never talk about the P word again, ever.

Mariana's Loft. Day.

It's the next morning and Julia and Mariana are in bed. They start waking up and the coupley affection overload continues.

Chaos doesn't want to get out of bed, Saint wants a sandwich, and whatever. Mariana's phone rings, it's some friend of theirs called Miguel who wants to drop by.

Wait. They have friends? Is he an ex? I thought the only people in their lives were family members and exes.

The girls then resume their coupley kisses and activities.

Later that day, Miguel arrives and he's got a cute little thing with him.

The girl ask him about Roberto and the kid says that his daddy Roberto is in heaven.

Uh, oh. I smell a sappy story coming on.

Tonight I leave you with.....

Gaby's acting! Because she's totally awesome!


Episode 106

Let the sad story of the week begin.

If I was a drinker I'd reach for the tequila right now because I get the feeling that it's the fucking homophobia bullshit again. Goddamn it.

Here it goes: Miguel and Roberto were in love, they even got married in Mexico DF. Then they found a surrogate and had a kid using Roberto's sperm: Betito, the little kid. Miguel became the stay at home dad while Roberto worked. Everything was great until Roberto died unexpectedly from an aneurysm and now his mom, Beto's grandma, wants to take him away. She only just tolerated their relationship, and now that her son is dead she doesn't want her grandson to be brought up by Miguel, the gay guy who isn't really his dad (in her mind). To make matters worse, the grandma is a really kick ass/well connected lawyer who has only lost two cases in her 40 year career. Miguel's screwed, which is why he's in Mexico DF now, he's looking for help to get out of the country with the kid.

Sucks to be you, guey. Sorry. But I feel like I've seen this before....

Julia and the kid-they're-trying-so-hard-to-make-adorable walk in together and there's all sort of pointless talk that's meant to highlight how cute the kid is and how very, very, very much he loves his dad.

Armando's Cave. Night.

Darmando update:

Is anyone surprised?

Mariana's Loft. Night.

The cute kid and the gay dad continue to be joined at the hip and full of 'I love yous' with each other. They even have a special ritual that they do every night, some special words that Miguel always tells Beto when he tucks him in to sleep.

The father/children relationships in this show baffle me. Did you all get along so well with your dads?

Anyway, after tucking the kid in, Miguel and Mariana talk alone in the couch because Julia is at Aparicio Central having dinner.

The first thing out of his mouth is how much Julia obviously loves her, and Mariana is all giggly like the girl in love she is.

She's also wearing some weird thing around her neck.

What the hell, guey?

She then wants him to explain to her what he meant when said he was leaving. He admits that he wants to get the kid out of the country, and even asks her where he can get a fake passport for him.

Mariana is not cool with the idea because of how dangerous it is and because of all the trouble he will get into. She suggests that he asks Meche, super Meche, for help. He's not convinced because he knows a legal battle will be very uphill because he's not the kid's bio dad.

Aparicio Central. Night.

Alma has called an emergency Aparicio meeting. Since Ileana found out about Alma's escort business and went completely crazy (and I mean C-R-A-Z-Y!), Alma has decided that's it's time to come out as a Madam with manwhores to the rest of the family.

When Alma drops the big bomb, well, no one really cares too much. They seem curious more than outraged, which is what was expected considering that they're the most open minded family in the galaxy.

I wish Alma wouldn't justify herself so much with the excuses about how they give 'therapy'. If you're going to do something like this, you should be unapologetic about it and just own up to it because, at the end of the day, Alma's boys are just expensive whores and she's their pimp.

Julia is the one who seems the most curious: she's the one who keeps asking questions about how it works.

If she wasn't with Mariana, she'd totally want to try out Alma's services.

Wait a minute, this is Julia, based on her history, being with Mariana wouldn't really stop her, would it?

Rafaela has a harder time digesting it, but she's mostly worried about Ileana. And she should be, because when I say crazy, I mean C-R-A-Z-Y!!!

The Aparicio women offer Alma their support. Julia reminds her that if Ileana accepted her relationship with Mariana and 'everything that happened' (she can't even bring herself to say the 'P' word anymore. Are you ashamed now, Jules?), then eventually she will accept Alma's manwhores too.

Meche's Office. Day.

Mariana, Julia, Miguel and Beto are at Meche's office so that Miguel can discuss his situation with the Super Aparicio. The sappiness continues with the overtly cute kid and his mega love affair with his dad.

I hope that didn't sound dirty, I didn't mean it in a dirty way. But I do think they're exaggerating their closeness a bit so that it seems so very, very, very cruel that someone would want to separate them.

Eventually Meche and Claudio arrive and there's introductions galore. Mariana and Miguel leave Beto with Julia while they discuss his case with Meche and I'm concerned that so much time with the kid will put scary ideas in her head.

Can you imagine Julia as a mother?


Tonight I leave you with....

....crazy Ileana! Because, holy shit!




  1. always a pleasure never a chore reading ur recaps! i always find myslef laughing out loud! i watch the video clip transaltions online anyways but i STILL rather sadly find my way to ur recaps for pure jokes..a testament of ur fantastic recap-ing skills i

  2. Amazing Job! Thanks for the recaps : )
    Good to see Mariana and Julia happy and kind of stable

  3. Ha ha ha... Awesome. And I've seen "What Makes A Family." If they had to copy a plot line. Why didn't they copy Pepsi? I would never advocate violence in the real world, (not that I would have to resort to that, because as Fresh2Def once said, the minute Julia said "Los Dos" the first time, I would have been out of there) but what I wouldn't give to see Mariana haul off and whack Julia. Maybe then I could forgive her for all the crappy things she's done... Oh, who am I kidding? Even one good smack wouldn't be enough...

  4. Funny recaps as always, but this show is so anticlimatic and like you said I didn't even know they had relationships with ppl other than family and exes.

  5. Love your recaps!!! keep them coming :)

  6. jajaja i love your recaps, at this moment i don't know who i love the most you or Mariana. ohhh, no Julia's confusing it's getting on me. it's a fact, Julia's confusion is contagious